


waiting for you [seungjin]

by minheels



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Best Friends, Cancer, Character Death, Gay, Hiking, M/M, Sad, Stray Kids (Band) - Freeform, Timeskips, Yosemite - Freeform, grab a snack, long story, lowkey based off my own goals, seungjin - Freeform, seungmin and hyunjin move to different countries, slow burn kinda, soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27135274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minheels/pseuds/minheels
Summary: seungmin and hyunjin have been best friends since high school. they both love the outdoors and made a promise to hike the john-muir trail at yosemite national park after graduating from university. however, a series of hardships follow seungmin, making it impossible for them to accomplish their dream together. meanwhile, hyunjin has to figure out whether he views seungmin as just a friend, or more.[ working AU; long fic with timeskips ]
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin
Kudos: 11





	waiting for you [seungjin]

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys!!
> 
> here’s chapter 1 of a longer fic that i’m working on. it’s my first stray kids and m/m fic, so please understand that ii t isn’t the best i would like it to be. hence, i would really appreciate any comments or feedback on things you would like me to improve <3 this fic is based off my own dream of hiking at yosemite national park and i hope yall will enjoy reading as much as i enjoyed writing this!
> 
> 21.10.20

**university; seungmin - 19, hyunjin - 19**

“hey, so how about climbing some rocks this weekend- ow!” hyunjin recoiled, pressing his palm to the back of his head, which seungmin had just smacked with his mathematics textbook. eyes stinging, he whined, “that hurt!”

”i told you to focus,” seungmin ignored him, returning his attention to the thick stack of notes in front of him, “if it weren’t for me, i doubt you’d be studying at all, and how do you expect to pass finals like that?” he slid a sheet of paper towards his best friend. “here— read this, it’s got all the formulae we need to know for this test.”

hyunjin groaned in annoyance and held up the paper to his eyes, screwing up his face as he tried to make sense of the complicated combinations of numbers and letters that seungmin had scribbled upon it. “i don’t remember our professor going through this.”

”that’s because you never pay attention in lectures,” seungmin muttered, not untruthfully.

”aw, come on. you know you’re much brainier than me— i’m useless at memorising chunks of information,” hyunjin complained, sinking his head onto the library table.

he wasn’t wrong. seungmin had always been the top student ever since hyunjin had first met him as a freshman in high school, thanks to his photographic memory and admirable self-discipline. hyunjin was by no means a terrible student, but he chose to focus his energy on other aspects that he found more interesting, such as his social life. he had always been the more popular one of the two, with his easygoing attitude and ability to hold an interesting conversation with anyone. there was no lack of girls crushing on him, not just because of his outgoing personality but also his looks. they were almost ethereal, each facial feature shaped so perfectly he looked as if he had just stepped out of a comic book. meanwhile, seungmin was quieter and much more studious, hiding away in a pair of round glasses and oversized hoodies.

however, the two of them found common ground in one area, and that was their love for outdoors. hyunjin had been in their high school library one afternoon, when he had spotted a book about the yosemite national park on a nearby table. moments later, when seungmin returned to the table to resume reading the book, hyunjin struck up a conversation with him and soon they were bonded by talk of cycling, rock climbing and kayaking, amongst many other of their passions related to nature. they found they both dreamed of visiting yosemite national park, and made a pact that after graduating from university, they would hike the john-muir trail there. 

perhaps that was why hyunjin had always shared a stronger bond with seungmin than any other of his more athletic or talkative friends. he sensed in seungmin a calm, loving spirit with a deep appreciation for the earth, not unlike his own. no matter what, hyunjin always found time to hang out with seungmin, even if it meant turning down invitations from his other friends. for that was the way it always was: seungmin was his first choice.

eventually, the pair ended up studying together at one of the most prestigious universities in korea, a feat achieved by seungmin’s countless tutoring sessions for hyunjin, which allowed him to scrape top marks. they had both joined the cycling team and took the same classes, planning to major in economics.

”as i was saying, let’s go rock climbing this weekend. there’s a good place nearby—“ hyunjin’s attempt to resume conversation was cut off by seungmin’s glower.

”hyunjin! your parents won’t let you come to yosemite with me unless you get the results they want. you can’t slack now!” seungmin scolded, “finish reading that set of notes and then we’ll talk.”

hyunjin sighed and resigned himself to yet another evening of studying.

**university; seungmin — 22, hyunjin — 22**

”seungmin!! i’m screwed!” hyunjin tugged on his friend’s sleeve, “you’ve got to help me!”

it was their last week before the start of their final exams, and they were once again studying in the library. seungmin removed his earpiece from one ear. “yes?”

”i still can’t remember the key concepts and they’re definitely going to test them. it’s the phrasing... i wish i had half your memory sometimes,” hyunjin admitted.

at this, seungmin cracked a smile and patted hyunjin on the shoulder. “don’t worry, you’ll be fine. here, see this?” he pointed at a diagram on his notes.

...

two hours later, hyunjin had finally understood the concepts and was able to recall the information needed as soon as seungmin asked a question. after another round of quizzing him, seungmin put down his textbook and grinned at hyunjin.

”great job.”

”thank you!” hyunjin flung his arms around seungmin’s shoulders dramatically. “once again, you’re my saviour!”

seungmin laughed. “what would you do without me?”

”don’t even think about that,” hyunjin shuddered.

...

all week, the two worked steadily. seungmin had turned a shade paler as he was indoors almost 24/7 in their library, feverishly revising notes and copying down as much information as he could. his own pressure to do well, coupled with needing to tutor hyunjin, only added to the enormous amount of stress that he had always faced as a top student. hyunjin, although working very hard alongside him, was nowhere near seungmin’s dedication. one night, hyunjin woke up only to find seungmin at his desk furiously reading through a book— and learned that seungmin was pulling all-nighters more often than not to catch up on revision. of course, this very much worried him and he pleaded with seungmin to take a break. however, seungmin was not to be stopped when it came to studying.

at last, the exams came. seungmin looked sick with nervousness, for this final exams season would determine if he and hyunjin could graduate with their university degrees. if he didn't perform well, all his years of hard work would go to waste. hyunjin was anxious as well, but wasn't too worried for seungmin and knew he would do well as he always had. 

thankfully, the exams went smoothly. to his pleasant surprise, hyunjin was able to answer most of the questions with confidence. needless to say, seungmin found the exams quite easy and to hyunjin’s relief, began to relax a little more.

however, midway through their exams, disaster struck.

hyunjin came back to the dormitory room that night to find seungmin hunched over his suitcase, frantically cramming in bundles of clothes. “seungmin? what are you doing—“ he stopped short when he saw seungmin’s face. if he had thought seungmin was pale before, it was nothing compared to his complexion now. he was white as a ghost.

”i-it’s my grandmother,” seungmin’s voice shook, “my little sister just called to tell me— she’s really sick. i’ve got to go back to our hometown to take care of her. i’m leaving seoul by next morning.”

”why you?” hyunjin asked feebly. the whole thing seemed almost like a dream.

”my sister needs to go to school and can’t tend to her until evening times. there’s no way i’m letting her give up school,” there was a fierce look in his eyes and hyunjin knew seungmin prioritised his sister’s education above all else, and had made countless sacrifices for her to pursue it. even in high school, when both of them were barely fourteen, seungmin was already skipping lunch to save his allowance for his sister’s school fees.

”what about the hospital?” hyunjin regretted the question as soon as it left his mouth. in their rural hometown, there was only one hospital. even getting there was expensive, and paying for treatment was out of the question for seungmin’s family, which was struggling even with seungmin’s scholarship. his parents worked in the city, far away from his hometown, but earned very little.

”i’ve got to go,” seungmin was determined, “she’s raised me since i was a little kid. there’s no one else.”

”but what about exams?”

for the first time, seungmin froze. then, speaking hesitantly, he replied, “i’ve told our professors. i’ve just got to skip them. my degree... never mind.”

”what? but you’ve been working hard all this time, you can’t stop now! look, they can’t just give you a zero like that. you can make it up or something. just don’t go,” hyunjin pleaded, “or i’m coming with you.”

seungmin looked hyunjin hard in the eye. “listen. there’s no way, i have to go. but please, you must stay and finish your exams. i know you’ll do well and get the results you want, so your parents will let you go to yosemite. after i figure all of this out, we’ll go together, okay?” he gave hyunjin a watery smile.

”no,” hyunjin mumbled, “no...” he felt his legs growing very weak and he stumbled. the last thing he felt was an arm catching him around the waist.

...

hyunjin didn’t remember going to bed, but when he opened his eyes, he was under his covers. seungmin’s bunk was empty. the only trace of him was a pile of notes and books on his desk, and a message on one of the covers indicated that hyunjin was to use them for his revision.

from that moment, hyunjin picked up the book and knew he would have to work twice as hard for seungmin's sake.

...

_SEUNGMIN: results day!! don’t stress, i know you’ll do great!_

hyunjin re-read the text message from seungmin for the umpteenth time. once again, the same warm feeling soothed his pounding heart, but it was only a brief respite. what if he had written out of point for his essay? what if he had mixed up concepts? a cold fear stole over him, but it quickly disappeared as soon as he re-read seungmin’s text.

they had been communicating mainly through text, and according to seungmin, his grandmother’s condition was not improving. yet, his texts always carried a light-hearted mood about them, and hyunjin hoped that seungmin was not forcing it for his sake.

two more minutes.

hyunjin waited in front of his laptop, finger poised over his mouse.

and then, after what seemed like an eternity, an update popped up on his screen.

inhaling deeply, he clicked on the button that would reveal his fate.

a full class list appeared on the screen, and his heart leapt when he saw his name. it was at the top. second place, with top marks in business and mathematics! grinning madly, the only thing he could think of was how happy seungmin would be to hear this news.

but then, he caught sight of seungmin’s name.

it was at the very bottom of the list. he was last in all courses except for the two that he had taken before his departure. in those, his scores were one of the highest, but were drowned out by the following row of zeroes for his remaining courses.

hyunjin’s heart dropped.

at last, he cried.

he cried for seungmin’s selflessness, seungmin who willingly gave up everything for his family, seungmin who had lost his opportunity to fulfil his dreams and the future he had always worked so hard to build.

it was a long time before the tears stopped and he had the courage to dial seungmin’s number. this time, texting wouldn’t have sufficed. he needed desperately to hear his best friend’s voice and know that everything was alright.

sniffing loudly, he gathered up his emotions before speaking into the phone.

”hey seungmin.”

”hey,” and in that one word, hyunjin knew that everything was _not_ all right. seungmin’s voice sounded thick, the same way hyunjin had when he was crying. it still had the same quiet quality, but the usual happy satisfaction that hyunjin knew was gone. it sounded shattered; broken.

”how were your results?” seungmin pressed.

hyunjin stifled a sob.

”they were great,” he replied hollowly, “second place... top in business and math.”

”that’s amazing!” seungmin exclaimed, “i knew you could do it!”

he waited, evidently expecting hyunjin to echo his happiness.

but hyunjin only felt worse. even when seungmin was trying to sound happy, there was still so much sadness in his voice. was this how it had always been? the cheerful text messages from him every day, only a mask hiding seungmin’s raw, conflicted emotions? what sort of friend was he to not even notice that?

”hyunjin? you there?”

hyunjin swallowed.

”you should go to yosemite now. i heard it’s really beautiful this time of the year. go and take some nice pictures for me, will you?”

“no,” hyunjin finally trusted himself to speak, and did so with an edge of firmness to his voice, “i’m not going without you. we made a pact to wait for each other.”

”hyunjin, i don’t know when i can go. my grandma’s going to need all the care she can get. we promised to go after university, and it won’t be fair to you to miss out on that.”

”yosemite can wait,” hyunjin answered roughly, “i don’t care about that. i only want to go with you. anywhere you want.”

”you shouldn’t...” seungmin’s voice trailed off, but hyunjin could hear the familiar happiness in it again. he smiled slightly; at least he had succeeded in making seungmin a little happier. 

”you’re the best. really,” seungmin beamed.

”no way, i wouldn’t get this kind of marks without your help. you’ve given me so much. and i’ll wait for you, always,” hyunjin promised, a note of finality to it.


End file.
